Why to ask these very serious questions yourself before getting marries? I understand you perfectly, seriously. Is there anything better than seeing your boyfriend kneel in front of you with a precious ring, asking a question you have dreamed of answering your entire life: will you marry me? At least in your universe, rosiness has built a protective layer around it, a shield that combats absolutely everything and where perfection lives.
Although it may seem like it, saying yes isn’t just about planning a perfect wedding, dancing until dawn, or planning a dream vacation with him, but you must think about the long-term relationship you will share with him!.
It is not an easy step, and you shouldn’t feel overwhelmed by it. You have to think about some things to get to know yourself better and learn what you want (and, more importantly, what you don’t want) from your next family.
Here are some serious (very serious) questions you must ask yourself before getting married or even before making a decision. Take note!
1. How much am I willing to sacrifice for my relationship?
The million dollar question, seriously. Work, sacrifice, and effort are related to any relationship, but wait! It is inadvisable to do everything in excess, especially if it means you get lost along the way but only to give yourself completely to your partner’s happiness without regard to anything else.
Initially, it might seem harmless, but when everything changes, you no longer recognize yourself, and somehow you no longer exist for yourself, but only for your partner.
It’s time to stop. Put yourself back on track. The following question asks you to be aware of the things you don’t want to sacrifice for the relationship and, of course, never forget that you are a priority.
The fact that you sacrifice for your love will always be a good thing, and it will result in a strengthened relationship, but be especially clear about your limits so that you do not make mistakes or get lost. If you both care for yourself and monitor your emotions, you’ll be in a better place as a couple.
2. What makes me laugh? Am I with someone who makes me laugh?
It is not worth staying with him if all you experience are problems and conflicts, and if you cry more, you laugh. Getting married is not exactly an adventure filled with roses and cotton candy; for this reason, you need someone who makes the journey enjoyable.
A selfish decision is not what we are doing. On the contrary, the goal is to visualize their lives, determine their willingness to solve problems and see the positive side of everything. It is complicated, but in those obstacles, it’s important to dress in the best attitude to conquer them and, incidentally, to laugh when the bad stuff happens.
On the good, bad, and worst days, hold hands with someone who is not afraid to face life with a huge smile. No matter what!
3. Is it important to me to have children?
It can be very important to many couples to believe they have children but have you thought about whether that is a priority for your boyfriend and you? A serious question to ask yourself before getting married, and not a simple decision but a total change in your life.
You should make this topic clearer than water before beginning together and for life since you must be on the same page and know your opinions if you’re both interested in having children.
They’ll be great parents, I’m sure. As a result, if one of the two is not convinced about adding members to the family, this is the time to mediate the situation or, failing that, to consider whether this is the person you wish to spend the rest of your life with.
You will likely reveal the problem over time if you don’t solve these doubts once and for all. You’d better save yourself battles, for real!
4. What if we can’t conceive?
Considering a solution to the problem of future variations is just as important as deciding whether to have children.
As soon as possible, discuss the options available: are they willing to adopt if they cannot have children naturally? Do they plan to undergo fertility treatments? ? Would they be ok with living alone and without children? What would be the long-term impact of the problem on their relationship? Answers must be given honestly, without hesitation, and with the primary objective to seek the best for each other and strengthen their relationship.
One of the most important things to know is that these topics don’t just come up after the wedding, but before making one of the most important decisions of your life.
5. Is it possible to team up with my partner?
In the first months, romance is cool, but when the honeymoon stage ends and the relationship begins to deepen, the true colors of both will emerge. Here the secret isn’t how many details were involved (although that’s important) or how much cutesy they shared in daily life, but whether they could build a relationship over the team’s success. Solid.
When you are with someone who will help you take on the world, especially if you add their thirst for creating projects, fulfilling them, and achieving their goals, you know that you are in good hands.
Putting dreams into action will be the beginning of our journey along a path filled with occasional surprises, work initiative, and motivation to improve every day for you, for him, and, of course, for both of you. Nevertheless, a team is always made up of two people. There is no other.
6. Am I in a fulfilling relationship?
Does your companion promote balance? I think this is one of those serious questions every couple has to address before they walk down the aisle. Having a good sense of your role in the relationship, of what you share, your partner’s feelings, and the emotional balance between you will help you determine whether there is justice or not.
What matters is not just who will pay for what or do the dishes on which day, but who is giving more or committing more than someone else.
And it means giving and making life easier for the other, but also living together in common agreement and finding an alternative where both exist in equal amounts and give their all, without reserve or reservation. That is clear. No one should have more or less.
7. What problems do my partner (and I) have?
You and he need to talk about sensitive issues. If he drinks too much and turns into a monster, if he never fights you and doesn’t pay attention to you,
In addition, he spends too much and won’t save, and he has mountains of debt with thousands of banks, he can’t solve problems without getting angry, etc. The list can go on. Trying to be perfect would have more complications than benefits. However, within this scheme of human problems, the conflicts that can hinder a relationship are also very evident. To return to my first point, how much are you willing to accept or reject in a relationship?
Suppose you do not accept some aspects of his personality or values. In that case, they should discuss it in great detail and decide on parameters for change such that the solution benefits both parties if they are prepared to accept it. Ok! Nevertheless, if you do not want to let yourself be haunted by your worst self or his, then it’s a good idea to take some time to analyze whether or not you want such a life.
8. Will I be willing to take on my partner’s role in helping him?
What if your boyfriend loses his job and enters a very dark period where he cannot support his family? What happens? Take the example of a close relative who is sick and requires your full attention. Would it affect your boyfriend? Consider a situation where you are ill and unable to work or perform the tasks you should be doing.
Are you willing to compromise with your boyfriend? Knowing there will be situations like this in your marriage will keep you grounded and give you more clarity about what it means to take your partner’s place at certain times.
Are you willing to provide for your family? What will you do without your husband? If you want a strong, long-lasting relationship based on teamwork, do it without fear! As you can imagine, the joke is knowing that you have the full support of your partner at all times and that you will never be alone again. That daily decision-making reflects true love. There’s no more.
Committing to one person your entire life takes maturity, and you must consider many aspects beyond the wedding. Take the next step knowing that you will have a partner for your entire life by asking these questions before getting married!